Because ranking things is fun, here are my top ten rides at Disney World. YMMV.
10. Mad Hatter’s Teacups. I adore the teacups. I always have. I don’t know. I know it’s a dumb, simple little ride compared to all the other shenanigans going on at Disney World, but I love it okay? Okay.
9. Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. Choo choooo! A pretty tame roller coaster, no huge drops or anything crazy, but it’s so intricately themed. It’s really quite amazing how much detail Disney puts into everything.
8. Kilimanjaro Safari. Are we allowed to count the safari as a “ride?” My list, I say yes. I truly dislike the fakey “omg poachers!” story that they add in, but dude you get to see lions and cheetahs and BABY ELEPHANTS.
7. Pirates of the Carribbean. This is one of those rides where there is so much going on that you really need to do it a couple of times. Some gorgeous, gorgeous tableaus of pirates doing piratey things like attacking cities and selling women and getting cats drunk. Totally reminds you that OH HEY pirates were/are actually the bad guys.
6. Mt. Everest. Or whatever it’s called. The new roller coaster in Animal Kingdom. I prefer kinda mid-intensity roller coasters (between like Big Thunder (low) and Space Mountain (high)) and this one was perfect. And it goes BACKWARDS. In the DARK. And there’s a YETI. Protip: Get in the first car if you can. It totally makes a difference in this ride, which is kind of annoying, but there’s one point where the front few cars get an awesome view that nobody else does.
5. Mission: Space (Orange). Or, as I liked to call it, Mission: Sinise. Under the guidance of the renowned astronaut Gary Sinise, you get to go in a spaceship to Mars. It pretty much rocks. There’s a “less intense option” (green instead of orange) that I guess involves less spinning, but I went balls-out into the more intense ride and didn’t regret it a bit.
4. Peter Pan’s Flight. Very simple, very gorgeous. The Peter Pan film retold with models, with you sailing above in a ship. True Disney Magic. Protip: FastPass this baby. I am so serious. It is beautiful and brilliant but the lines are huge and it is short and I don’t know if I’d like it so much if I had waited for 90 minutes each time.
3. Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin. You get in a rocket and shoot at Emperor Zurg and if you *ahem* score above 300,000 you become a SPACE ACE. Really though, it’s so much fun. And if you’re doing it within an hour or two of when Magic Kingdom closes at night, there’s practically no line and you can just do it over and over and over and DESTROY ALL THE ALIENS RAWWWRRR. *cough*
2. Haunted Mansion. Gorgeous and spooky. We did this ride about a half dozen times and I saw new things each time. It’s so cool. Protip: When you’re in line and you come to the fork in the road where they tell you to go either left or right because they both go to the same place, go left. It takes longer, but it’s awesome. Make sure you touch everything. *is mysterious*
1. DINOSAUR! I rode this ride like it was going out of style. We would get to the end and I would run the circle back to the front. The ride operators started to recognize me and welcome me back. I loved this ride. It’s a scary time-traveling adventure with dinosaurs and smoke and levels of awesomeness that can’t be transmitted over the internet. Trust me. Dinosaur. Don’t take small children unless you know they’re extra-hearty.
BONUS LEAST FAVORITE RIDE: Tower of Terror. I should have known better. Never again.