What a decade the last few months have been, huh?

Let’s recap:

  • February 2020: I celebrated 10 years with the second love of my life by visiting Las Vegas, Disneyland, and the San Diego Zoo.

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Possibly the last time I felt pure joy in 2020: the morning I discovered you could get booze in your coffee at Disney’s California Adventureland.

  • March 2020: Employer closes its physical offices and stay-at-home begins for Massachusetts.
  • April 2020: Strangest birthday of my life, probably. (Hopefully.) Stay-at-home still seems temporary.
  • May 2020: We have to say goodbye to the first love of my life. She was 16 and a half and had been with me basically my entire adult life in Boston. I still can’t talk about it, really.

 

Black and white cat looking out a window
Wednesday a few weeks before she died, watching the birds.

 

  • June 2020: Still staying at home. It’s feeling less temporary. We pull off the most challenging conference of my career, successfully turning a 1000-person IRL event into a 3500-person virtual event.
  • July 2020: I quit my job. (These last two bullets are mostly unrelated.) My partner and I also temporarily moved across the hall so our actual apartment can be renovated. Everything is obviously very calm.

Oh, and the whole world is in an unprecedented health and economic crisis, Black people are being murdered in the streets and in their homes, and the U.S. is turning into a fascist police state before our very eyes. No big deal. SO CALM.

But I’m still here, still kicking. Still moving forward.

I’ve been trying to reset a bit since my last day of work. I’ve been doing a lot of nothing, a lot of self-reflection, a lot of self-care—mostly catching up on my “stories” (AMA about Love and Hip Hop: Hollywood) and reading books at a rate I haven’t achieved since I was writing my senior theses in college. Up next: I’ve given myself permission to take off another month and focus on writing. I’ve never done this. I don’t really know what’s going to happen.

But—I don’t really know what’s going to happen in general in the world, so might as well, right?

As my partner and I keep saying to each other, “we’re all just doing the best we can.” It’s all we can do.

Wear your masks.